• President Bush has been trying — rather unsuccessfully — to extricate himself from the mess he made with a false claim about Iraq in his State of the Union address.

• White House press secretary Ari Fleischer's resignation became effective last Monday, even as questions from the media about Bush's erroneous speech came hot and heavy.

• Earlier this month, the only man absolutely qualified by experience and personality to become Bush's new spokesman about Iraqi matters surfaced. What's more, he needs a job and even knows the territory.

That man is, of course, former Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf.

You've gotta remember this guy. The beret-wearing al-Sahhaf — more popularly known as "Baghdad Bob" — saw a much different war than the rest of us. No matter how bad things were for the Iraqi armed forces, Baghdad Bob remained undaunted in his daily press briefings.

For instance, while the U.S. army was meeting only token resistance entering the Iraqi capital, al-Sahhaf insisted: "The infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad."

Each day during the war, al-Sahhaf's public falsehoods got more and more incredible. Democratic Party public relations adviser Dale Leibach is an admirer — sort of.

"We need to bring him over here to practice his amazing public relations skills," Leibach laughingly told a reporter. "He has taken our profession, such as it is, to a level that is as inexplicable as it is humbling. I would hire him in a nanosecond."

Leibach, like the rest of us, will probably never forget Baghdad Bob's finest hour.

"I have never seen anyone handle himself with such 'skill' as he demonstrated during his press briefing with his Ministry of Information building literally on fire, causing him to move his news conference to the sidewalk, and with the flames visible behind him, saying with a straight face that they had 'the infidels' on the run, that the Iraqis are winning this war.

"They just don't teach you that in college," Leibach said.

You can't tell me Mr. Bush couldn't use a man like that, particularly when the president's critics are saying his explanations stretch credulity. Bush and al-Sahhaf might even find something on which to agree.

"The American press is all about lies!" Baghdad Bob said. "All they tell is lies, lies and more lies!"

Sounds like every White House press secretary I've ever heard.

But if the information minister is going to work for the president, he has some making up to do with his new boss.

"I speak better English than this villain Bush," he said.

"We're going to drag the drunken junkie nose of Bush through Iraq's desert, him and his follower dog (Tony) Blair," he predicted.

"Bush is a very stupid man," he opined. "The American people are not stupid, they are very clever. I can't understand how such clever people came to elect such a stupid president."

Bush would be wise to let bygones be bygones. Baghdad Bob can be pretty persuasive if he has the right audience. All over the Arab world, they believed his daily claims of battlefield victory, no matter how outlandish they were.

Millions of Arabs then were greatly disappointed, not to mention surprised, when it turned out that American and British troops had won such an overwhelming victory. But they had to admire his arrogant — if totally fabricated — zeal in the face of what for him must have been a painful reality.

Here are just a few of his most outrageous utterances preserved by the website:

• "There is no presence of American infidels in the city of Baghdad."

• "We butchered the force present at the airport."

• "Iraqi fighters in Umm Qasr are giving the hordes of American and British mercenaries the taste of definite death."

• "God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis."

• "Who are in control, they are not in control of anything — they don't even control themselves!"

• "We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid."

• "Lying is forbidden in Iraq. President Saddam Hussein will tolerate nothing but truthfulness as he is a man of great honor and integrity. Everyone is encouraged to speak freely of the truths evidenced in their eyes and hearts."

• "They're not even (within) 100 miles (of Baghdad). They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion ... they are trying to sell to the others an illusion."

• They are nowhere near the airport ... they are lost in the desert ... they can not read a compass ... they are retarded."

• "They are not in Baghdad. They are not in control of any airport. I tell you this. It is all a lie. They lie. It is a Hollywood movie. You do not believe them."

• "We are winning!"

Compare that with Ari Fleischer's puny defense after the administration couldn't document Bush's State of the Union assertion that Iraq had attempted to buy uranium in Africa to develop nuclear weapons.

"We don't know if it's true, but nobody - but nobody - can say it was wrong," Fleischer said. "That is not known."

Huh?

It would appear Mr. al-Sahhaf would fit right in at the Bush White House.

Sam Pollak is editor of The Daily Star. He can be reached at spollak@thedailystar.com or at (607) 441-7208.